She is brave…
She is vulnerable…
She is strong…
At first glance, the idea that a woman can be both strong and vulnerable seems to contradict itself, when actually it’s because a woman is brave enough to unleash a vulnerable heart in this world that she becomes strong. Restoration for our souls and true connection in our relationships are only cultivated through vulnerability. If women are ever going to come together to support one another, we must stop hiding behind this false sense of perfectionism. Comparison and insecurity are the root cause of our carefully constructed facades and neither can live where God’s love has settled. We must choose to allow God’s love to fill our hearts and enable us to cast down fear and be vulnerable.
As women, we tend to put up walls and pretend everything is fine in our lives. We don’t want people knowing our “stuff” or having our weaknesses on display. I get it. Opening up and being vulnerable with anyone outside my immediate family has always been a struggle for me. I don’t like or want the attention and I care too much about what others think of me. But we can’t hide because we are ashamed that we are going through a difficulty and don’t have it all together.
If we are going to reach the lost, help loved ones heal or find restoration for our own souls it has to come through connection, through relationship and being vulnerable enough to say, “This is what I am going through and I need someone to listen” or, “This is my story and this is how God brought me through it.” When you truly connect with a person and allow God to open your heart up, their response is almost always, “Really? Me too!” Something you say takes hold and lets them know they are not the only one going through that situation. Women need mentors on the other side of issues to encourage them. We even need people to just listen and say, “I don’t know what to say, but I’m here for you.” Even if our stories are not exactly alike or my “stuff” isn’t nearly as bad as yours, woven through the hardships are similar threads of light, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, self-control, faithfulness and healing that God can use for each unique situation. His truth and biblical principles enable all of us to connect and come together to edify and walk alongside one another. Everyone needs vulnerability in their relationships and everyone is called to be vulnerable.
“When she is vulnerable she is at her bravest.”
In order to fulfill God’s purpose, we must allow the Holy Spirit to guide us, even in our struggles. He has more room to operate when we lay down our fear and selfish pride. Be strong and courageous. Being vulnerable is not a weakness, it is one of the strongest things a woman can do. When she is vulnerable she is at her bravest.
It’s okay not to be okay. You need to find someone you trust and be open with them about what you are dealing with. Being vulnerable doesn’t mean you go blabbing about all of your problems and “venting.” It means seeking out someone close to you; your husband, a close friend or relative, and confiding in them and allowing them to encourage you. Please know that you weren’t meant to do life alone. Oftentimes the way God chooses to bring relief to our situations is through vulnerability in relationships.
We should also be willing to share our own stories in order to encourage someone else. For me, relating to someone else’s feelings, emotions, marital difficulty or motherhood experience gives me hope and reassurance that I’m not alone in what I’m going through. God leads us to share in areas in which we have struggled and we have to be willing to follow that leading. My hope is that through the next several weeks I can be vulnerable and share pieces of my story and struggles and someone reading might be able to relate and respond with, “Really? Me too!” If I can encourage one person and help them know that they are not alone in this journey of marriage and motherhood, then I have fulfilled the purpose God has put on my heart.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.